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    July 09

    海岛地震中的猪幸福(外一篇)

    话说地震当日,家宝正在圈中小寐。惊醒,一个鹞子翻身,不料力道把握不当,应是生生地踏断脚下的地板……

    家宝同志一时愣住,茫然地立于断层之上,等待救援,同时无助的低吟:の…………

    姐姐终于忍无可忍,冲过去一阵暴打:死肥猪!原来你就是震中!!!

     

    隔日,得一佳联,挂于阿宝门上——

    庙小妖风大

    水浅王八多

    横批——肥猪满圈

     

    阿宝:T_T~我脑震荡才刚好……我容易嘛我……

     

    PS:话说回来……地震当时……偶还真以为是阿宝摔倒了的说……

     

    外篇:630日正午发生的一件关乎颜面的大事件(郑鱼鱼口述)

    中午去西堤艺施,和一辆Z字牌的抢车位。由于过于相信自己的技术,于是一个直角转弯,直接插进对面反向停车位。正打算一退再一进,完成这个PERFECT PARKING,不幸从后视镜看到,小福的PP与旁边一辆神龙小富康的大屁股间距不到1CM……当场泪奔……直接挂电话和黄叮当以及COWBOY求助……二人在JY了一堆不可行方案后都得出同一结论:小姐,去路边拦辆的士吧……

     

    继续泪奔……从副驾座匍匐而出……在路边猛挥手……朝一辆靠边的紫色的士飞奔而去,MS见到了失散多年的叔叔……师傅~给你10~帮我把车倒出来吧……

     

    师傅从副驾座匍匐而入……询问了何处进档何处倒档后,未把方向盘,开着副驾门,直接一踩油门……小福就屁癫屁癫地回到大马路上了……

     

    打开钱包,发现只有一张20的大钞……

    师傅~……

    哎呀~我也没有零钱……

    咬咬牙……那就不用找了……

    ~谢谢谢谢~

    ……

    继续泪眼婆娑地目送师傅屁癫屁癫地朝紫色的士奔去……

    同时一脸愤恨地看着那辆开到路口去U-TURN的头文字Z……缓缓地步入姐姐刚退出来的车位……

     

    正欲回首,手机传来一阵鸭鸣……

    黄叮当班长:郑老师啊~有位陈班长正朝你而去啊~

     

    T_T~还姐姐20……

     

    PS:鄙视下LQH咖啡的那个开车送货小弟。看到姐姐受困于车上四处电话求救时,非但没有主动伸出援手,还下车实地考察一番后,一边向同伴描述,一边窃笑着扬长而去……

     

    PSS:就在接偶求救电话的三小时后……COWBOY的车撞了……啦啦~

    不过~BOYI同学~这个不叫厄运转移……这个应该叫做……不愿助人为乐的报应哈~

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    郑同学...大施美人计的时候...怎么选择破财类...笨笨笨笨真是笨啊.以后钱包留张5块就好...

     

    打开钱包,发现只有一张5元小钞……

    师傅~你看……

    咬咬牙……哎呀~那就5元吧……

    啊~谢谢谢谢~

    July 16

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